In this short story Boundaries, a woman throws respect out the window when she feels disrespected by her Mother-in-law. Boundaries is written by Orobosa Ikponmwen
Boundaries written by Orobosa Ikponmwen
Everyone has them – Every person, every group, every family. Basically anywhere anybody is, there is always that one person who does not understand the concept of boundaries.
They’re either trying to talk to you like you’re familiar friends, dip their hands into your pot or enter your room without permission when they’re nothing but a visitor. The worst of them are always just that – visitors who want to get “in”.
That is my present situation.
Somehow, this girl that works as my mother-in-law’s personal assistant does not understand boundaries; geographic, environmental, or even boundaries by location.
Actually, she thinks Egypt is in the Middle East. She empties trash into her neighbour’s roadside bin – which, by the way, is locked with a padlock and nobody knows how she opens the cage – also, she doesn’t knock before entering. The only time she knocks is when she wants to enter your house and once she’s in, believe me, she thinks she is in.
I get it. My husband and I are quite famous and people love us and want to be around us, but this? I didn’t sign up for this. When I married this man, nobody told me I’ll have his mother’s assistant in my house trying to cook my food without permission.
Yes, she really cooked my food without permission.
I mean, I’ve been watching her for a while, hoping my mother-in-law will curtail her assistant’s foolishness, but no. It seems my mother-in-law doesn’t get it too. No surprise there since she encourages her behaviour.
Some weeks back, my husband and I had some friends over. His mother sent her assistant to help out. I was having fun and in a bit of a tipsy situation and I asked her to help the other girls in the kitchen.
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This was my first mistake.
She went to the fridge and saw some carrots and green peas. She came back to me and asked in that high-pitched voice of hers, “Can I help you cut them?”.
I thought, Great! Some help and said, “yes!”.
My other mistake.
She must have taken that as some sort of sign because half an hour later, the aroma of Fried Rice wafted into the living room. Plates of fried rice, chicken and salad found their way in trays to my guests.
I was livid.
How do you go from “Can I help you cut them?” to “Hey everybody, I made the biggest pot of fried rice the world has ever seen.”?
I asked her where she got the chicken and salad from and she said, “Mama gave them to me.”
As I said, I was livid. I gave her some transport fare and told her to head back to where she came from. On her way there, I sent her “boss” a long and flowery voice note on the importance of boundaries and why she should keep her hands and employee out of my home.
By the following weekend, we had a family meeting on my behalf about how I should learn to respect my mother-in-law. I can’t tell you most of what was said because again, I was outraged. Too angry to see what was right in front of me.
When asked about why she kept on sending the girl to put her hands where she’s obviously not welcome, Mama sneered. She pointed at me and said, “It’s like you think I’ll wait till I’m about to die before I get my grandchildren.”
I know, I know. What an ending, right?
What boundaries do you think were exceeded?